Christmas in June!

First sign of Christmas:
This morning (11:45) Booby made me breakfast. 2 eggs over easy (total perfect yoke runny not slimy), bacon, 12-grain toast. Then did the dishes! All the dishes even the nasty greasy shit from the bacon!

Second sign of Christmas: 
Later on as I was putting clothes away I found a secret stash of money under my undies. $100 I’d put away god knows when, I don’t even remember! Yippee!

Third sign of Christmas: 
When it rains, it pours. We race a lot in the Midwest. And it’s been raining a lot lately, with tornadoes and hail and shit. Dam you greenhouse effect! I recently noticed for the first time my “colleagues” were getting oddly aroused at the site of me in my rainboots with shorts. Tall black boots, black shorts, it took me a while for it to dawn on me (yeah, I’m that clueless, the stripper look.) Today I finally decided to put an end to that. I bought boots that should not arouse weird fantasies.

Aren’t they the cutest? How can a pink boot with white polka dots provoke any sexual visions? Unless of course you’re a total pederaste predator, then there’s NOTHING I can do for you, sorry…

Fourth sign of Christmas: 
I’d been bitching and bickering about our old Verizon aircard. The usb port on it was used up so bad, the connection was as finicky as I can be on the worst of worst pms days. Today, in the mail, was a brand spanking new Verizon Mifi unit. A Mifi! Wireless on the go! Yahaaaahhhh! Oh glee, oh joy! I’m a hap-hap-happy camper!


Fifth sign of Christmas: 
I was reading book two of Stieg Larsson’s Millenium series (The girl who dreamed of a jug of fuel and a match, direct translation, don’t know which of the titles it is in English) when my stomach started to rumble. I asked Booby if he was getting hungry too. He said he was on it. He grilled burgers and (slightly over-spiced, oh when will you learn moderation Booby?) cajun shrimp. Shrimp. Get em while you can thank-you-very-much-you-fuckin-assholes at BP! AND I had some fresh lime in the fridge to go with that cold Corona calling me by. my. name…

*****

Thanks Jerrod. Thanks for making me jealous of your new 4G iPhone, bragging about it’s greatness, how it was Christmas for you only to make me realize: Hey, it’s Christmas for me too! So there! I poo on you and your phone.

In the meantime dear followers/peeps/stalkers, please start writing all your letters to Santa, begging him to convince Steve it’s about time he ditches that useless AT&T provider and goes with a REAL cell phone company. Hello Verizon? How much longer do I have to wait???

p.s. Jerrod, I am glad at least something is good in your life right now…  Cheers!

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12 thoughts on “Christmas in June!”

  1. @ KLZ: mmm iPhone… mmm4G.. (not to quote Homer Simpson, but I had to)
    @ Jennifer: Pink? Polka dots? How can they NOT go with everything? Including my wonderful sunny “disposition” in life! haha! Is that the correct saying? The hardest thing to adapt to in a 2nd language is expressions. They are so hard. I always get screwed up in them but appear to have mastered the art of cussing. Ah sweet sweet cuss words, where would I be without you and my new pink boots (Thanks Target! They're comfy too!)

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  2. Hey new Friday followers. Thanks for joining us here who believe life is a bitch but worth a laugh… I will check out your sites ASAP, thanks again for following and commenting my sweet little abode of a cyber-house! (hmm, just thought of a cool name for a blog “Cyber House Rules!” sorry, I own it now… haha!

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  3. yay for christmas in June!!

    btw – totally random – my eyesight SUCKS, even with contacts… and when I saw the pic of hte black boots on my feed, well… it looked like a dildo. for lesbians.
    I hope that makes you laugh. HARD. It should 😀

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  4. @ Holly: thanks, those boots are so sweet! I almost wore them tonight, but it was sunny and 200 degrees out all day. It'll have to wait!
    @ Confused: a dildo? for lesbians? I didn't know there was a difference between a dildo for lesbians as opposed to hetero or gay guys… I need to do some research! And I'm blind as a bat too, even with my geeky glasses! Glad to know I'm not the only one.

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  5. OK….I'm giving this one more swing. If it doesn't post, it will be my third strike.

    What I said was…..

    OOOOOOOMeGod…I've been waiting FOREVER for Verizon to come out with an iPhone. I've been so tempted to get a Droid, but I know that if I do…..iPhone will debut the next week.

    I also said….I couldn't respond to your comment on my blog because your email is not enabled on Blogger. 😦 But yes, I am the Godmother of the Blogfia. 🙂 Look for “hits” and assignments on twitter under the hashtag #blogfia.

    I'm going to hit “post comment” one more time. If something doesn't happen this time, heads are gonna roll!!!!!

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