I hate it when people use their finger to push food onto their fork… Why not go ahead and eat with your hands?
p.s. don’t you think I should not only teach people etiquette but ART too?
We had lunch today with a group of men. 3 short men. 3 short men with lot’s of money. And the desire to let you know they have money. But they’re short. And they have lot’s of interesting stories! Guys in their late 40s – early 50s are of the coke generation. You know when drugs started being fun before they got majorly fucked up with meth and all that nasty shit… Their stories were about that time.
So, after lunch, I ask Booby what would make a man feel the least manly: being short, being bald or being unemployed and broke?
Booby: Being a short fat balding guy without a job.
Me: I’m not talking about George Costanza… Pick one, what would make YOU feel less of a man?
Booby: Being short I guess
Me: My ex always told me how not being able to “provide” is what made him feel less like a man… He hated that I had to be the provider
Booby: Yeah but he was a loser, that’s different
Me: He was an ACTORRRRR! (actor to be pronounced with an intense fake British accent)
Booby: Why didn’t you tell him to ACT like he was working? You know, “study” the bagger job at the grocery store!
So… that’s my labor story for today when most of you are at home, on a short holiday. Me? I’m working, yeah I’m a loser with a job (for today).