Fun & Fearless Female

Years ago I’d occasionally pick up a copy of a pretty cheesy magazine: Cosmopolitan. The surveys were fun ditto on the tips on how to please your man… But I would also love to read a series of profiles they labeled Fun Fearless Female. I’d read with envy the lives of such fantastic women remembering when I had dreams of building a career such as those featured in this raunchy magazine.

Recently to fight the fear of sailing and the over tilting of the boat I’ve adapted a new mantra: I’m a fun and fearless female.

As soon as my heart starts to cringe I immediately repeat my new mantra over and over hoping it’ll have a soothing effect. Either that or I’ll simply brainwash myself into self-improvement.

I’m a fun and fearless female.

The other day I picked up my packet of birth control pills. I stared at the little day stickers asking Booby what day it was. That kinda shit happens when you’re unemployed, you never really know what day of the week it is. “Tuesday, why?” Uh oh. “Nothing, just wondering…” I swallowed 2 pills. Monday we had some little pillow fun, if you know what I mean. Wink-wink-nodge-nodge “Bow-chica-wow-woooow” Tuesday I was ovulating. Sometimes we just know these things as I’m sure you’ll appreciate the lack of detail sharing. Sooooo, pillow play, ovulating and a skipped pill.

I’m a fun and fearless female.

Twitter has a cool feature where you know how your followers group you. And when you appear under a new list you can go and see what category you fall into. One follower labeled me “Most likely not a zombie” How nice of him. I thought it was so cool, I used it to label my resume on the online hosting thingy. I’m sure my future employer is looking for a candidate who is most likely not a zombie. I mean, who in their right mind would want to hire a zombie? Right?

I’m a fuckin’ fun and fearless fuckin’ female!

p.s. Expecting an update on the roller derby shit? Coming, dear peeps, coming…  ツ

Photobucket

Advertisements

29 thoughts on “Fun & Fearless Female”

  1. Oh gotta love the “I missed how many pills??” panic don't ya? Well the good news is you are a fun fearless kick ass female so whatever life throws at you pumpkin, you will be awesome!

    Like

  2. If you're in a position to hire staff, you have to be careful when trying to avoid hiring Zombies. They have a very strong professional organizational watchdog looking out for discriminatory practices, the:
    Group of
    Anti-
    Defamation
    Zombies
    Opposing
    Occupational
    Kaotic
    Situations

    (Zombies are notoriously bad spellers.)

    And you can't bargain with them because they just listen to all your arguments, and then they eat your brains.

    Like

  3. @ Lost: I F'in love you for saying that! How much do I owe you?
    @ Random: I'm a pumpkin? Before or after midnight? Get it?
    @ Edie: Next month is scuba lessons… cannot wait for THAT!
    @ bluz: well, I'm not in position to hire staff, but I always wondered about zombies' spelling skills (thank god I canceled out all poor spellers when I WAS on a dating site)
    @ Kat: I can't wait to start reporting about it… so far it's pretty kool (that k is in your honor)
    @ Girl: I was totally thinking it would be for you too though, ever consider it? You're a rockstar… Wanna move to San Diego?
    @ Alex: I find it HARD to believe YOU haven't found your way on some weird twitter lists! I call shenanigans on that one!

    Like

  4. Oy! You are my fun and fearless hero because you live on a boat. I say this because I have been a recreational boater on vessels of all sorts for the better part of my life. I know, all too well, the work that goes into spending a few days on a boat. (I am a pro at the pump-out, just sayin') So, you actually living on a boat?….Cheers, lady.

    Cheers, Nikki!

    Like

  5. Haha.. I applaud your fearlessness on the whole boat thing.. I almost cry whenever I get on a boat & I work for a marine agency!!
    Also, my kids went to the roller derby last weekend, so I've been thinking of you.

    Like

  6. UG! I got tired of being a fun and fearless female when it came to birth control and switched to the ring. It's great! I just have to remember to take it out once and put it back in once a month. I was ALWAYS forgetting the pills and freaking out.

    Like

  7. @ Girl: :o)
    @ That: oh yes, please do! We should start a series called Fun Fearless Female where we talk about how we're facing our own demons and growing (or getting killed by it) I think it would be cool!
    @ Cinder: and so are you!
    @ Heather: pump outs are more fun than they appear hahahaha!
    @ JJ: heyyyy! where've YOU been?
    @ Cake: the ring? nuva ring? I tried that, and was totally NOT fun and fearless, I was sick every single day I had that thing in me… 😦

    Like

  8. You ARE a fun fearless female! I joined Twitter months ago and haven't been back since. People keep following me but they must realize I have NOTHING to say. I'm a true zombie!

    Like

  9. I'm on a couple of twitter lists. One of them is called “people i may or may not stalk”. I've been on it for MONTHS, so my guess is SHE'S got commitment issues!

    You have an award waiting for you over at Glitter Frog.

    Like

  10. Two words for you, kitten:

    Nuva Ring

    Changed my life, and HUGELY lowered my stress levels.

    Look into it.

    Also?

    Totally digging (and in full agreement with) the new mantra.

    Rock on.

    – B x

    Like

It's not a monologue if you leave me a comment.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s