Say Something In French

Him: “You’re French?” and you can feel his jittery excitement.
Me: “Yeah, so what?” and I think, uh oh, not this again…
Him: “Say something in French for me” and you know where this is going…
Me: “Y’avait une chèvre dans la cuisine” always got to have a go-to phrase for these moments.
Him: “So exciting!” is that a pistol in his pocket, or…
Me: “Yeah well, what do you know?”

This is a Studio 30 Plus writing prompt based on “There was a goat in the kitchen“. I’ll give you 3 guesses as to what my say something in French was… Never mind. I’ll give you just one guess. I slanged it up though. That’s the way I roll baby.


14 thoughts on “Say Something In French”

  1. And I bet he never knew he was a horny old goat getting turned on by a goat. You should include a sound recording of yourself gently growling the words. And I will totally be saying that now when I need to sound mysterious.


  2. No one ever believes I am from Alabama when I tell them. I’ve heard myself talk a lot lately when my kids film stuff on their cell phones. I never realized how weird my voice sounds. It’s kind of like a little hint of southern mixed with some kind of region-neutral news anchor voice mixed with valley girl. I swear I wouldn’t make you dance like a monkey if we ever hung out. As long as you don’t make me say “Hey y’all” or some shit, because I don’t think I have actually said “y’all” since I was in kindergarten. Which was when I told myself to never say it again. I usually do whatever myself tells me to do.


  3. It’s very reassuring that you roll the same same in French and English, even with a goat in your kitchen and a French fettish freak in your personal space.


  4. HA! I used to date a woman from Germany and she used to talk German around me all the time. Thinking I was being nice, I took a few classes and started to learn the language. Slowly but surely, I figured out she had been insulting me and Americans in general for a long time. We didn’t last much longer as a couple. (Apparently, ALL Americans are fat, pizza guzzling, video game playing morons. Who knew?)


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