I Won!




We are pleased to inform you of the release of the long awaited results of the EUROMILLIONE LOTERIA S.A PROMOTION held on 24th of August 2012 your email address attached to the Ticket No:TK/365\\9NL that drew the lucky Winning No Y-871GTH.

You have been approved for a payment of 300,000.00Euros (THREE HUNDRED THOUSAND EURO) in cash credited to File Batch No XQ1017BN This is from a total cash prize of THREE MILLION EUROS Shared among the ten International winners in second categories.

All participants were selected through a Multi international computer ballot system drawn from 98,000
(Ninety eight thousand) names of email users around the world.

To begin your claim, do file for the release of your winning by contacting our accredited agent: Foreign
Transfer Manager: Mr. David Barbel
Email: euro_million@aol.com
Tel: +34-634-075-250

YOUR SECURITY FILE NUMBER IS D1-67/WM4 (keep personal) Remember your winning must be claimed not later than (04-09-2012) after this date funds might be returned to the lottery company as unclaimed prize furthermore should there be any change in your address do inform your claims agent as soon as possible.

Congratulations once again,

Yours Sincerely
Mrs. Rita Mendez
This image is absolutely irrelevant to the post. But since I downloaded it for free from istockphoto.com I figure I may as well use it. It just supports the fact that I am a true winner in life.

As requested I sent them my date of birth, my social security number, my mother’s maiden name, the name of my first dog (not sure why they needed this), my bank routing number, the name of my favorite movie and my favorite color. Which oddly enough all this info together mashes into my most commonly used password.

But they don’t know that.

The best part of this is how they specify the written amount in brackets. If it weren’t for that I would not have known it was $300k. I’m so not used to seeing all those zeros. That and I’m not a mathematician. On most days… Plus its in Euros! I can finally tick off “become Eurotrash” from my bucket list!
AND, have I mentioned I never even entered such a contest? How lucky is that? Talking about luck, I don’t usually look in my junk mail box. But this morning I just so happened to peak into it and voilà.
I’m a rich lottery winner!
Like most lottery winners, I will not change who I am. I will not quit my job, because I’m not a quitter and … job? What job? I will not start wearing expensive clothes (I’ll stick to fake copies, but will buy more of them) and I’ll keep my friends.
You just can’t buy a good friend anymore because people have “principles”.
Oh-boy-oh-boy I just realized I can now eat all the bacon in the world! All of it because I’ll be able to afford liposuction annually. Let the baconfest begin!
p.s. I may be a winner but I sure am losing the battle in the spacing. I have NO idea why my paragraphs are stuck together!

12 thoughts on “I Won!”

  1. congrats on your winnings you forgot to mention that you will be a good person and give some to charity see the money is changing you already you’ve forgotten the less fortunate..lol try not to spend it all in one place like on bacon 🙂 great post by the way had me smiling


  2. Hmph. First you get all the blog spam love, and now this? I guess I should just be grateful you’re keeping your friends. Because I don’t have a single principal to my name and bacon just happens to be #46 on my bucket list. Yep, just like that. Bacon. One word. #46- Bacon. Followed by #47. Nutella. And #48- Be the most popular kid in school and then reveal during my speech for student body president that I actually have a parasitic twin growing out of my boob cleavage. Yep. Sooo…. now I forgot what I was talking about….


  3. Wow! And to think you are still humble enough to remember the little people and drop us a note of this major award! I sent them all of those things AND my kidney, but I haven’t heard back yet (fingers crossed!)


  4. Hope you have better luck than I do. I’m still waiting for Gaddafi’s daughter to get back to me on that business deal she wanted to let me in on. Sure it’s been like 9 months since we last communicated, but I guess she’s really busy making the arrangements or something.


  5. hopefully you didn’t really provide those people with any personal information. A while back my dad received a notification that he won a home stereo system. All they asked was that he pay the shipping. Unfortunately I was not home at the time and I couldn’t warn my dad that not all people in this world are honest. He sent the $50 shipping fee to the company and in three months, his home stereo arrived…a pair of earbud earphones, and not even a good set! Buyer beware, especially when you win contests that you didn’t enter…nice blog by the way…


  6. Hey! I won that one also! Well, that one and about 10 others. I’ve been saving those emails for a long time and have a folder full of them on my computer. The scary part is that some people really do fall for it. I guess that’s why they keep sending them out…


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