A Thing or Two About Life on a Boat

6 people over for supper - the day after
6 people over for supper – the day after

Last night we had 6 people over for supper. I made my mom’s world famous tourtière. That’s french for ground pork and lots of melted lard in a lard based pie dough. That’s also french for oh-my-liver.

This morning I totally debunked the myth about Gatorade and hangovers. I would tell you the result but that would imply I may or may not have had a personal experience with hangovers today. Since I am now linking this site in random job applications, I wouldn’t want my potential employer to think I am a lush. Better keep some things a mystery.

On the topic of mysteries why have I not been snagged yet by the world’s most luckiest of employers?

Why I ask you why?

This picture was the scene in my kitchen before the clean-up fairy stopped by. Sorry. It’s a galley since I’m on a boat. Nerdy boat talkers – shame on you for messing with people’s vocab! Actually I could totally submit this image for this week’s Daily Post Photo Challenge about background and foreground. In the foreground is the dirty dishes. In the background my cabinet which normally holds the dishes. Notice how empty it is? That’s because everything was dirty. Like an old man’s mind surrounded by Catholic school girls sporting their cute little porn-star short skirts uniform.

Six people. Eating around the same table. In a boat. A sailboat. How can I put this into words? It’s not that it’s tight, our boat is 40 feet so it’s decent in size. But let’s be honest here, it’s not a yacht.

The difference between a boat and a yacht is like a million dollars.

So much dirty dishes. Six people on a boat. Talking and swapping stories about sailing and cruising. Scary stories. Stories to keep you so far away from the water you’d swear to stick  to whores’ baths for the rest of your dry life! Stories about 90′ waves and boats just dropping out of sight. Do you know that when a boat sinks it doesn’t leave a visible trace?

Six people on a boat swapping stories can be a frightening thing even for a fun fearless female like me. Ha!

By the way, the clean-up fairy is myself. I only pretend after the cleaning is done that it was somebody else who did it, or that it got done magically. I pretend I have people who take care of me. I pretend to pretend. Sometimes the pretending gets to be so well done with oodles and oodles of ingenuity I confuse where the line of pretending starts and ends.

Like this post. How does one end a post like this?

***THE END***

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20 thoughts on “A Thing or Two About Life on a Boat”

  1. A tight atmosphere, both enviromental and people wise, that you described would be so delightfull to me so I am thankfull for reading this story and expiriencing it in a way myself, at least in my thoughts. But I hate dishes, there’s a pile similar to one on the picture in my kitchen right now! Can I rent your fairies? 😀

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  2. ha. i need a clean up fairy….the stories could be a lot of fun you know…i love stories…more than i like dishes…though my wife thinks its sexy when i do dishes…so i have motivation…

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  3. This post hit the spot for me! i am dry docked in Ohio and although we get our boat up to Lake Erie every now and again, sigh, weekends and over-nighters only serve to make me want more. For years I have been trying to talk hubby into selling the house and buying a boat to live on. My hat is off to you for doing it! Good luck with your job search, but I have to say, there’s nothing wrong with keeping a stash of Gatorade around – just in case.

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    1. Dry docked? Oh that hurts! A boat needs water, if its not in water then it’s not a boat it’s just an uncomfortable rv.

      Hope you get out of there soon! And yes, I do keep a stash of the gatorade (which incidentally was purchased in case we crossed the Pacific, which we didn’t do)

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  4. I don’t know how people do it living on a boat, I like my space and solid ground…….aka……not something that can move………..lol I am also the clean up fairy in this house and if I don’t do it,it doesn’t get done

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  5. Sounds like a fun dinner party regardless. It seems you have plenty of work as a fairy, so just do the “day job” electronically! Thanks for letting me escape my land lubber existence for a few minutes via your blog.

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    1. Yes. Nothing beats an evening among other pirates (who don’t steal, maul, rob, and who smell nice). I’ve never had as much neighbors as I’ve had since I’ve lived on water. Such a cool thing, I’ll never get over it!

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    1. The tourtière is a traditional christmas meal. But I love it so much I make it year round. It’s my signature comfort food.

      The nastiness of the sea is humbling…

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  6. Now, I wouldn’t have this problem, because I don’t have a boat. Plus, I’m anti-social, so I wouldn’t invite anyone over… which is probably why I don’t even have four other friends to invite over anyway.

    I think I just made myself get depressed…

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  7. Who needs a yacht, when you have a real, live Clean-up Fairy? We kind of alternate that role, here. When I cook/grill, [Maris] fairies. (Yes, I just totally verbed fairy. I love verbing nouns that aren’t used to being verbed.) When she cooks, or doesn’t notice me doing it in time to stop me, I do the fairying. It works.

    And in the job search, never give up and never surrender! My last unemployed speedbump lasted the better part of two years. Just don’t quit. Here endeth the pep talk. 🙂

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  8. I have something better than a dishes fairy, I have teenagers..well they arent perfect but most of the dishes get done most of the time
    I would seriously miss my big kitchen these days, but you have me thinking of a dinner party

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