A Cut and a Massage

“Are you still seeing Chuck?” Mona asked me.


“Really?”  Does that mean she stopped seeing him and is getting her hair cut elsewhere? She’s the reason I found out about Chuck in the first place.  She’s the one who told me to go to him… What is she insinuating?


“What do you mean ‘why’? The leaning in?”

I ran my fingers through my recently trimmed and colored hair. Ever since seeing Chuck, I’d never gotten such compliments on my hair color. He was a hair whisperer. He mixed colors in a way nobody else ever could.

“Well. I… uhm….”


She’s appalled. I can tell she’s appalled. That means he leaned into her the same way he leans into me. With his hips just so. I remember the first time he leaned in. I moved away in the chair thinking he needed the space. Or something. But he only took over the recently free’d space. Inching in closer. He was all over my shoulder, my upper arm. That was the first contact.

“What? So he leans in a bit. Look at my hair!”

She shook her head. “I can’t believe it.”

“Where else am I going to get foils of different colors, a cut AND a massage for only $40?” I asked her.

“A massage? He’s giving you a massage?”

Did I just say that? Did I really just say that last part out loud?

“Didn’t he massage you too?”

“Wait. Where’s he touching you?”

“In the salon” I impishly answered.

“Where Marie as in on your body? Is it just the head?”

La-la-la-la-la-la. “Maybe…”

“Oh my god Marie. This is not normal!”

“Mona. Look at my hair! The highlights. The lowlights. The different shades. It’s amazing! I’ve never looked so good! So what if he’s helping me relax a little bit.” Do not mention the invitation to go in on Tuesday when nobody is there so he can give me a full body massage. Do not mention it. Do not mention the hand vibrating attachment. Don’t. Whatever you do don’t talk about the ‘vibrator’.

“HE should be paying YOU” she laughed at me.

“But, didn’t he massage you too? Not even a little bit?”

“I stopped seeing him after the second visit where he leaned into me.” She did? She never told me that. All this time I thought she was keeping quiet about it. Like I was. It was the only thing that made it bearable for me. Knowing she was putting up with his hairy Lebanese fingers just as I was. But that vibrating thing feels so goooood on my shoulders. 

Should I tell her about it? No. She’ll think less of me. 

“Really! How long ago was that? You never mentioned anything.” I nervously ran my hand through my hair hoping to reveal more of its colors and hues.

‘I stopped going there over a year ago!” It took a year to progress from his pelvis pushing into my shoulder to having him undo the top buttons of my blouse and offer a full body massage? Funny how time flies. 

“I don’t know if I should tell you this but…”

“There’s more?” Oh god. Backtrack. Retreat. Stop. Don’t talk! DO NOT MENTION THE VIBRATOR DO NOT MENTION THE VIBRATOR! STOP!

“He uses this thing that straps to his hand, and-”

“A vibrator? He’s using a vibrator on you? Marie! Holy crap!”

“It’s not normal? He said it helps for the color to stick if I’m relaxed.” There. That might convince her I’m not allowing myself to be used by the hairdresser.

“You need to stop going. Tell me you’re not going there anymore.” Bye-bye great hair. 

I shrugged. “Sure. Yeah-yeah. I’ll stop.” What do I do? Do I call him and cancel the full body massage?  Or do I go, take advantage of it and then end it.

“Marie. No ‘yeah-yeah’. Tell me you won’t go anymore.”  Dammit.

“Right. OK. Do you have another hairdresser you can recommend?”

wordpressS30PBadge (1)This falls under two prompts. One is the Daily Post’s Weekly Writing Challenge: The Best Medicine where the purpose is to focus on humor in a post. It also falls well into this week’s prompt at Studio 30 Plus: ELUSIVE.

I’m not going to tell you if this is a true story or not. It may not make you see me in a positive light. Ahem. Look! SQUIRREL!


22 thoughts on “A Cut and a Massage”

  1. I’ve actually paid money for a full-body massage twice. It’s pretty creepy, but my husband loves it, so I bite my tongue. Well, when they break out with the heated stones and oily stuff, it’s not too bad. And the peanut butter smoothies beforehand. It’s tolerable. Closing your eyes and pretending it’s not a 60-year-old lady makes it easier. Okay, who am I kidding. It’s fucking AWESOME!!


    1. Why is it ok to pay somebody for a massage, and it can even be called therapeutic. But when a hairdresser offers it for free it borders on prostitution? Not that this is necessarily a true story (cough-cough) but… the shit you can do when you’re holding one of those little machines!


      1. When we lived in Korea, ALLLLL the hairdressers did that. It was a totally normal, expected thing. It freaked out most of the soldier’s wives. If they were with their husbands, many of them would pitch a fit if the hairdresser started with the massage stuff. It was so ridiculous. They just couldn’t wrap their brain around the cultural differences.


  2. Oh my this was funny, made me think what would I do would I like it or not would I feel strange or excited or excited in a strange way………….oh well never will know as my hairdresser doesn’t do anything like those things………….lol


    1. Thanks Cathy! Actually I was telling this story to my friend the other day, so when I saw the topic of the prompt I knew I didn’t need to go digging too far… 🙂

      It was a fun exercise in dialogue using subtext. I’m still learning!


  3. I confess, the head massage is often the best part of any hair cut and colour. Not sure I would be keen on hairy fingers..but if there was magic in those fingers…and a great cut..darn, what a tough decision lol


    1. Right? I was with a gang of friends, talking about rising costs in hair care and when I bragged about MY special prices they were all over me. I didn’t want to hear it, I just wanted the free massages… Being delusional is part of my attraction.


  4. That situation sounded like a bargain at any price. I try the Vulcan Mindmeld on my yoga instructor when she gives the mini-should massage during the final relaxation part of class. “Keep going, don’t leave, keep going … damn, where are going???” Pretty kinky, eh?


    1. Ha! I do the same thing every time Leo starts rubbing my back and try to brainwash him via super waves between our two spirits. Or something like that.


    1. Oh my capacity for denial will allow me to put up with a lot. Maybe too much at times. Yet in this particular situation… it just wasn’t really quite right.

      It helped that I moved out of that town, some may say I fled the country. Whatev. 😉

      Thanks for your visit!


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