What Happens in a Public Shower…

Showerhead (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Back in the day, when I worked out daily at a public gym, stuff would happen. Stuff happens to me all the time. But when this gym was halfway between the home and the place of work, well needless to say showers at the gym were imposed.

BEING STUCK BETWEEN A DIRTY WALL AND FLESH
My gym had a pretty big shower area. There was the common spot with over 5 shower heads, and on one side was 3 private stalls. I always chose the common open area. I had my reasons (general laziness to walk to a stall, close the door, lock the door, only to find out the shower wasn’t working, then the process would need to be repeated in another stall). Actually, I was generous in leaving the stalls available to the women who were uncomfortable in the open area.

I’m a general Mother Theresa type of person like that. Always a giver.

I may be a giver, but one thing I don’t like is to touch dirty shower walls with my wet and freshly washed skin. I get the hibby-jibbies over such contact. It’s like the shower liners in hotels. I don’t even want to come near those! Not sure what’s worse. coming in contact with a dirty wall or with a naked woman I don’t know.

Whoa! What a segue right? The reason why I mention it is, well, there was this time when… A woman was standing in the doorway. She was blocking the doorway. She was a rather large’ish woman. My shower was done. She wasn’t done talking with her friend. She saw me. She knew I was done. She saw me picking up my shower bottles, my soap, and my scruffie thing. Yet, knowing all this, she remained there.

I didn’t want to make her feel like I couldn’t get by her. Didn’t want to make it obvious that her frame was the actual width of the doorframe. I decided to play the “Red rover” game and clear my way through to the 4 inches of opening between her naked body (had I mentioned this aspect? She was naked. She wasn’t showering, she was just chatting in the doorway. Naked. There should be rules and regulations against that.) So I am mid red-rover, almost in the clear, when she decided the time was appropriate to laugh. Not a mild chuckle, nor a simple ha-ha. No. She needed a full out belly laugh, the pee-your-pants kind of laugh. And that’s when it happened.

I got stuck between a dirty shower wall and a naked large’ish woman.

AND THEN THINGS GOT WORSE
This was another day. And another encounter. One entirely different.

I was alone in the shower. I was totally enjoying the freedom to bend over and grab my shampoo bottles without any concern for who would see what because there was no other who present to see any what I could have. Or something like that.

But turns out as I opened my eyes after the second rinse and repeat that I was not alone. Oh no. Not at all! A woman had walked in. She was with her two sons, they needed to shower before entering the pool. She was muslim, so she obeyed her religious laws. Head gear, blouse to the wrists, and full length pants. All I could see of her was her hands, her feet (pool rules). She insisted her sons get a full and complete shower.

“Get your hair wet too” she told them.

Just as I had omitted to mention my previous lady in the shower was naked, I forgot to mention the age of these boys. One would think that if a mother brought her sons in the women’s showers, they would be about 3 or 5. One would be wrong. In this particular case at least. These boys were over ten years old. I’d say maybe 11 and 13?

Their own mother, all they could see of her was her face, hands and feet. And then there was this strange woman, fully exposed. I didn’t even have a towel to hide myself. It was hanging outside the showers, on the hooks. I think they ignored their covered mother.

For this performance I deserved the Academy Awards for best female performing a role of deer caught in headlights.

My life is grand…