The Right to Pursue Happiness

Not the right to BE happy, but the right to chase happiness, or to try to be happy. Try. Nothing more. Just try… I say this is lame.

Trying is defined as an attempt to do, to test, to endeavor, to give it a shot… not to do or to achieve. This means you can lean back and relax in the role of victim and stick to the old beauty of the if’s.

“If I get a job, if I graduate, if I get a promotion, if somebody loves me, if I get a child – a home – a car – a bonus then maybe, maybe I can be happy.”

And then what? What more will you need to finally be happy? You got a diamond ring? Now you want pearls. You got the pearls, oh that Gucci bag would do you fine. Hell, a woman can’t walk around in knock-offs, you need those Jimmy Choo’s or whatever they’re called. There is no end – once you build a wish list of material objects to meet your happiness expectations, you fall into the rabbit’s hole of hollow needs.

The day I realized being happy wasn’t a right, but a responsibility was the day shit starting happening. Boom. I had to decide to be happy. I had to decide to stop playing the victim, I had to stop whining and just start being happy. Boom.

It’s like learning. You learn about as much as you put out into your learning. Ask questions, study, read, go beyond your comfort zone, and then you will learn – because you took action and took responsibility in your learning process.

Same goes for happiness. Take it. Whatever you need to be happy – but take it from the inside. Start with a smile. That smile will send messages to your brain, like a direct command to feel something gurgling from your stomach. And then smile again knowing it is having positive effects. Sure, you’re brain washing your own self into a psychological white picket fence interior decorating… Who cares, it works.

And laugh. Laugh at anything. Laugh at the duck that nearly runs on top of the water to get away from you. Laugh at the dog running after its tail. Laugh at your boss with the silly hyena laugh. Laugh at the waitress with a piece of toilet paper stuck under her shoe. But laugh with love, not arrogance. Let them in on it, don’t just mock them into inferiority only to make yourself feel better. Boom. More gurgling from the stomach.

Become addicted to that sensation. Give it a name. Give it a color. Give it an image, or a familiar place so when shit starts rolling your way you can close your eyes and remember that sensation. You can escape to it by visualizing it in your head, then you let that emotion roll down to your stomach. Boom.

Being happy does not make you immune from life’s hardships. You’ll lose a job, lose a friend, lose a favorite ring or even lose a child. Being happy is not a vaccine against anger, or frustration, or sadness and fatigue. But it will carry you through that crap.

One day you will be experiencing sadness for a loss, but you will know that inside you, underneath the tears, there is a foundation of joy whispering to you. This inner joy will hold your hand and carry you beyond the clouds. Boom.

Happiness: it should pounce.

………………………………………………………..
S30PBadge (1)This is my response to the weekly prompt at Studio 30 Plus. Actually, the prompt is “it should pounce.” It was taken from a poem called Silence written by the amazing and gifted writer Thomas Marlowe.

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37 thoughts on “The Right to Pursue Happiness”

  1. I’m crying. With happiness and with awe at the incredible work you’ve done with your words.

    HAPPINESS should pounce, indeed, my friend, indeed.
    xo

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    1. 😀

      Man… my work has put me face-to-face with so much misery! Shit Kir, there is too much sadness and hardship in this world. I know I’m not like eloquent or classy, but what I do know is that my Roger-Rabbit attitude works. Sigh.

      Thanks.

      Like

      1. you are eloquent and classy and completely awesome too.
        I have to remind myself daily that the happiness, the yellow sunshine of optimism I have always surrounded myself with is a necessary accessory esp in the middle of the misery of the real world.

        xo

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  2. I agree with all you’ve discovered. Happiness is a treasure we must seek and when we find, we must hold dear and share with others…
    Thank you for putting Happiness together so beautifully –
    and thank you for sharing 🙂
    AnnMarie

    Liked by 1 person

    1. But that’s just it though, don’t you think it’s a responsibility? It’s like beyond choice, it’s an obligation to ourselves… Right?

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          1. No not at all. I get the idea of pursuing happiness and very much agree. I also think that some don’t realize that they can actually choose to be happy. And I love your paragraph about smiling. Just that simple act can totally change the energy of a situation.

            Like

  3. Ingenious, to remind that we can actively gift ourselves (and others). Engaging simplicity – we don’t have to purchase anything to be able to effect this change in ourselves – and yet it’s the mother of all possessions, really: The smile. The happiness.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Even some of the worst things can still be seen in terms of fun.
    there’s plenty of toys that would make me happy. But none of it would work without me being happy inside.

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    1. Right on Spanky! I totally get it, it’s like a toy railroad track in your basement or a motorcycle in your garage – how can you enjoy it when there is no interior spark?

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        1. I’m always sweating when Leo has me hold stuff while he solders away, but I’m kinda addicted to the smell, not of my sweat, but the hot metal, so I always agree… I tried learning to weld, but kept burning my fingers. All that shit is magic!

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          1. I did have gloves, apparently gloves are the number one reason people burn their fingers – they don’t feel it coming until it’s too late.

            Rosin and Flux – Eau de Toilette by Givenchy.

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  5. Thank you for writing this. It’s an impressive and powerful system. Sadly, not everyone has the capacity for doing what you describe here – much like not everyone can sing.

    Those of us for whom your model works do indeed have a responsibility to pounce on it, and in so doing, hopefully in some small, sweet way, we can honor those who cannot.

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    1. Thanks Joe. I wonder about those who cannot, I mean beyond those who literally have the chemical imbalance limiting them physically… I really do remember feeling like I had found an inner switch inside, an on-off switch where prior to that I was always sad, crying, and without any sense of hope. I just took it upon myself to change, forced out on me actually and didn’t give myself any choice. I stopped saying”but” after the”I want to be happy” part. I was one of those persons who just couldn’t be happy, who couldn’t find happiness… If the formula worked for me – the lost cause – it can work for anybody. It has to!

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  6. Happiness is something that you work for, that you grab with both hands, and that you are NOT owed. That’s what sticks with me. Happiness just doesn’t fall in your lap-you go out there and hunt it down. You look for it in the simple everyday and you make it a goal for your future. You don’t expect it to find you cowering in your meek corner. Happiness is for the brave, the bold, and the badass. SO happy that you’re one of the brilliant women for whom happiness is a part of the everyday joys. Keep being happy, Marr!

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    1. I agree with you – happiness IS for the brave, the bold, the badass because like you say – you have to grab it. I wish it just fell into my lap… but then again I’m glad it didn’t because now I can totally own it.

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  7. I was trying to think of a good comment as I just started rambling about everything and nothing! This post is SO true and honest. I never had much, I still don’t have much. And by this I mean material things, like no car, no house that I bought etc. – All things that most people put value on. Things shifted when I chose “me” instead of “what others want me to do”. I always valued my own imagination and the worlds hidden books and it was this that made me happy. There is a sense of peace in knowing that there is happiness in the smallest of things. 🙂 I totally love to watch ducks. They are so silly haha.

    Just a perfect piece, Marie. ❤

    Like

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