Who Are You and What Do You Want?

How do I answer these questions? That’s easy: “I don’t know.

Thanks to my meditation I’ve realized that I cannot answer those two basic and fundamental questions: who am I and what do I want?

Not to do any blame shifting, but 12 years of supporting someone else’s dreams has literally given my life a blank state. Don’t get me wrong, those were some of the best years of my life! Working as a racecar mechanic and touring the country 10 months out of the year, each year, until we packed it up and moved onto a boat? Yeah. Fun times!

The party is over, and it’s time for me to return to me. My entire life – I’ve always known what I wanted. I’ve always had goals, ambitions, dreams, and a very specific idea of what I wanted to do, and accomplish.

Not anymore.

I’m guessing this is the main reason behind my current woes and life drama. I’m taking all the necessary steps to fix this situation.

  1. I’m meeting with two potential life coaches today and tomorrow to see if one can be a fit, and help me craft my vision.
  2. I’m starting up with a new group that meets every Wednesday evening – it’s a mindfulness group. Thank you Kaiser Permanente!
  3. I’m also starting a one-on-one therapy to happen every other week or so.

Feelings of excitement and giddiness are overcoming me as one can experience  before a trip. Life is an adventure, if we knew where it took us, who knows who would want to engage in it as much…

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2 thoughts on “Who Are You and What Do You Want?”

  1. “The only thing you know you can be sure of is that you can’t be sure of anything you know” – my reinterpretation of Socrates’ famous paradigm of knowledge. That also applies to what we believe to know about who we are and what we want. This knowledge needs to be tested against reality on a regular basis. My knowledge of who I am and what I want was just recently toppled, but this crisis of identity has reignited my ambitions. I know now that I want to redefine who I am, by expanding and proving what I am capable of. Of course, this will be tested again by reality. Frequently.

    Does that sound life-coachy enough?

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